So….as you all know, I am a first time mom to be and with this comes a whirl wind of new experiences and first time changes! I have learnt so much in this time, including what NOT to say to pregnant women as I, myself have encountered so many different things from various sources…even the random strangers.
Most of the time, I’d just laugh it off, with my horrid, yet sweet loud laugh, but I started to wonder if people ever put thought into what they say to pregnant women or do they just blurt out the first thing that comes to mind? Has this been going on for decades before me and how will these thoughtless utterances end if it is always excused…
1. “OMG, You’re so tiny” or the opposite extreme “OMG, You’re so BIG”
If I received a R10 for every time someone has said this to me, I’d seriously be able to pay for private birth on my own!
I swear this is probably my TOP most annoying thing people utter to me while pregnant and completely turns me off from conversating or sharing anything.
This is NOT how one would pick up conversation with any pregnant woman, this ‘norm’ has got to go! Please and Thank you.
Instead try “Wow, you’re carrying so nicely”, or just ask about how far along the person is or be considerably creative.
If you would like to pick up the conversation with sharing your own personal experiences (it’s always lovely hearing about other mothers’ experiences) then feel free do so in a considerate manner, i.e DO NOT come with unsolicited advice. I’ve only recently started to challenge this type of talk, because I mean, seriously, what is the point of this type of comments in any case?
2. “How’s the bump doing?”
I honestly dislike referring to my baby as a bump, yes I have a baby-bump, but inside is my little amazing human life that’s growing and already weighs more than a kg. Rather try asking how baby is doing. Acknowledge the life I am carrying. 😊
3. Assuming things about MY pregnancy life…
- Like “I’m sure you have enough support” or simply assuming it’s all rainbows, sunshine and butterflies.
I think the worst thing is assuming, especially when the facts and full story is unknown to you.
Instead, ask the person if they’re okay, or that you’re there if they need anything, chances are they’d never ask you for anything, but the gesture speaks volumes.
4. Going with the flow of the mood swing.
Lol all the million mood swings and ton of additional hormones has probably caused so many people to dislike me. The only solution to this is to kill that mood swing with kindness and love. I swear it’ll make any pregnant woman break out in tears. Life is so weird and overwhelming when you’re pregnant and sometimes a little kind word or deed is all that is needed to make the world balanced again.
And that’s a wrap for now 😊
If you can relate or if you’ve experienced other interesting comments, please share them below! I’d love to hear your stories!